Posted in Filipino, journal, love, poetry, random, Uncategorized

Paano nga ba nagsimula ang lahat?

Paano nga ba nagsimula ang lahat?

Nagising na lamang akong hinahanap kita
Tanda ko pang pilit kong pinaliliit ang aking mga mata,
Mahanap ka lamang sa tila langgam na kumpol ng tao
Pagmulat ng mga mata ko sa umaga, ngalan mo rin ang bulong ng isip at puso ko

Paano nga ba nagsimula ang lahat?

Nakita ko na lamang ang sarili kong sumusulyap sayo
Hindi ko batid ngunit gustong gusto ko ang mga ngiti mo
Ang gaan din sa pakiramdam ng malamig mong tinig
Kapag ika’y tumatawa, ramdam ko ang saya ng iyong puso

Paano nga ba nagsimula ang lahat?

Maniwala ka, mahal, sinubukan kong pigilan
Ngunit traydor si Tadhana at hindi niya ako pinagbigyan
Sa halip na paglayuin, mas lalo pa tayong pinaglapit
Hanggang sa puso ko’y tuluyan mong nasungkit
Paano nga ba nagsimula ang lahat?

Hindi naman kita kilala
Miski pangalan mo’y hindi ko ikinababahala
Noon ay hindi man lang kita tinatapunan ng tingin
Bakit ngayon ako sayo’y nagpapapansin?

Paano nga ba nagsimula ang lahat?

Nahihiya akong aminin ngunit talaga yatang mahal na kita
Naghihikahos ako sa tuwing ang mga mata mo’y bihag ng iba
Paano ba iyan?
Ang mga sintomas ng pag-ibig ay akin na’ng nararanasan

Paano nga ba nagsimula ang lahat?

Sa pagsambit ko ba ng mga salitang “mahal kita”?
Sa pagtanggap ko ba na hinahanap-hanap kita?
Hindi ko alam kung paano nagsimula ang ating kuwento
Pati huling pahina natin ay hindi ko sigurado

Ngunit mahal, masaya ako sa tabi mo
Sinisigurado ko sayo, mananatili ako hanggang dulo
Hindi ko man maalala kung paano tayo nagsimula
At kahit ‘di ko sigurado kung paano magtatapos ang ating istorya.

florence

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Posted in Filipino, journal, poetry, random, Uncategorized

journal #1: sa jeep

VIII.IX.XVI.

Sumakay ako sa jeep na bumabiyahe patungong Pritil. Pagkaupong-pagkaupo ko ay agad akong nag-abot ng bayad kay Manong Drayber. Maya-maya pa ay may isang batang gusgusin na sumabit sa jeep. Pawisan ang kanyang noo at may bakas pa ng dumi sa kanyang braso. Isa-isa niya kaming inabutan ng kapirasong puting papel.

Mayroong nagkunwaring tulog at pasimpleng hinulog ang papel; may hindi man lang tumingin sa bata; mayroong diring-diri sa puting papel. Iba’t ibang reaksyon ang aking nasaksihan.

“Pasensya na po sa abala. Para lamang po sa pagkain.”

Makaraan pa ang ilang segundo ay nagsimulang kumanta ang bata. Napakapamilyar sa akin ng kanta – Anak ni Freddie Aguilar. Pagkatapos kumanta, muling pumasok ang bata sa loob ng jeep at dinampot ang mga puting papel.

May pasaherong ibinigay sa bata ang papel; mayroong diring diri sa paglapit ng bata; may nagkukunwaring tulog. Ganoon ulit -iba’t ibang reaksyon.

Inilabas ko ang aking pitaka at akmang mag-aabot ng piso sa bata. Pero may naalala ako. Paano kung hindi naman pala iyon ipangkakain ng bata? Paano kung ipapasok lamang niya ang pisong balak kong ibigay sa coin slot ng isang piso net?

Paano kung hindi naman pala siya totoong mahirap? Sayang din ang piso ko kung sakali. Ibinalik ko ang piso sa loob ng aking pitaka at pinagmasdan ang likod ng tumatakbong gusgusing bata habang papalayo ang jeep sa kanya.

Sa panahon kasi ngayon, hindi ko na alam kung ano at sino ang totoo.

florence

Posted in poetry, random, Uncategorized

Autumn’s Fall

Once, there was a girl named ‘Autumn

Her hair was ebony black like that of Snow White’s

Her skin was pearly white like that of a mermaid’s

And she had eyes brown like a chocolate bar

 

Over the years, she learned many things

Her friend Joanna died of cancer on January

Thus, she concluded that life is just temporary

“Life should be cherished,” she told herself

 

Seven years later, Autumn fell madly in love

Tom was so perfect that she became mad and sane whenever he looked at her

Oh but Tom! Tom crushed her poor heart and soul

Autumn was devastated that she questioned Him above

 

Despite the drops of snow on that unfaithful day, Autumn ran

With her bare feet and shattered heart, she headed to her home

She knew that her mother’s warm embrace would heal her

Her father’s rare smile would surely calm her storms

 

Upon her arrival, Autumn realized she was wrong

She saw her ruthless father hurting her mother

She looked at her coward mother who has been sobbing three hours long

Instead of seeking comfort, Autumn went upstairs

 

Inside her room, she did her best to hold back her own tears

Autumn tried not to listen to her mother’s soft sobs and her father’s loud voice

Then she opened a drawer and held the cold deadly metal between her fingers

“People are temporary and so is life,” she whispered so no one would hear

 

A new day started with orange leaves falling

Autumn’s mother was crying louder than she did the day before

Her father’s eyes looked sad and sorry all of a sudden

And all of this was because Autumn had fallen

florence

Posted in acrostic poetry, Filipino, poetry, random, Uncategorized

Suki, Mura Lang Dito!

Dito na umiikot ang buhay namin

Ito kasi ang pinupuntahan naming mga

Vendors na araw-araw kumakayod para makakain

Ito na rin ang aming tahanan kahit pa maraming

Snatcher na masipag mambutas ng bag

Olats pa kami sa tuwing dumarating ang MMDA na walang patawad

Rapsa na sana ng buhay kung walang manghuhuli

Imbis na kami’y tulungan, ang mga buwaya pa mismo

Ang nagtutulak sa amin patungo sa kangkungan

Trese ang platong nasa hapag-kainan namin tuwing gabi

Ano na lamang ang magiging kinabukasan nila?

Rambol dito, rambol doon

Aasa pa ba akong magkakaroon ng mabuting asal ang aking mga anak?

Nawa’y hindi sila lumaking iniisip na tama ang pagbebenta ng mga produktong peke na

Aking pinasok para lamang sila’y may makain.

florence

Posted in poetry, random, Uncategorized

Reality Rejected

I thought I saw a magical bird

It was zooming across the sky

I thought I saw a unicorn

It was running across the meadow

I asked my mom and she answered,

“It’s an airplane, not a bird”

“I saw a unicorn!,” I screamed in delight

Mama shook her head and said, “It’s just a horse”

She called my name and I sat beside her

Mama spoke, “Unicorns aren’t real, you’re just imagining things”

I gave her a questioning look before I ask,

“Magic isn’t real?”

 

A tear flowed down my cheek as my mother nodded.

florence

Posted in poetry, random, Uncategorized

Finally Free

I hear muffled voices

Or am I just hearing them in my head?

I feel chains wrapped around my wrists

Are they clasped on a wall?

 

I feel myself falling down

Am I really dying?

I hear my own footsteps

Or are they someone else’s?

 

My eyelids are glued to each other

I tried to open them and I succeeded

All of a sudden, emptiness succumbed me

Like the vast dark space in front of me

 

The chains magically disappeared

And I have nowhere to go

I can move my bare feet

But I don’t know where I’m heading

 

I was lost

Like a white rabbit in the midst of growling wolves

I was so lost

Like a tiny black dot on a white canvas

 

Monsters start to appear

Sharp claws reached for me

Their glowing eyes pierced through me

And caused me to fall into a black hole

 

I opened my eyes

Instead of emptiness, everything felt right

The monsters were no longer here

For I am finally free from my own shadow

florence

Posted in poetry, random, Uncategorized

random #9: me

The curls of my reddish black hair. The imperfect arc of my brows. My slightly crooked nose. The little curve of my lashes. The brown color of my irises. The sound produced by my lips whenever I speak. The indefinite shape formed by the lines on my palm.

Every sad spark my tears make. Every eye smile I show the world everyday. Every unpredictable movement of my hand when I’m writing. Every high-pitched squeal I make when my favorite song plays. Every muffled yawn of mine whenever I’m sleepy. Every shade of gray under my eyes. Every heaved sigh I make whenever my expectations fail me.

I am me.

florence